THOUGHTS FROM A HOLISTIC LAWYER

ON BEING DIRECT (and Wild)

The other day a friend of mine started asking me questions about why I was so “direct” and how did I get this way. This is not the first time that I have been described as “direct” and honestly, it is not usually a compliment. My “directness” takes people aback; they are surprised with my honesty and speaking up about how I see things.

I have come to love this part of me as it makes me whole. I spent too long dismissing it and burying it and being punished for it. I embrace my boldness, my ability to see clearly in this messy world. I love it. But sometimes someone gets hurt, it seems. That’s what my friend said. He was worried I would lose touch with humanity and only consider myself. Oh, I thought. That is worth exploring.

So I thought about it, rolled it around in my mind, meditated on it. How can I become less “direct” so as to protect others’ feelings? I don’t want to hurt anyone after all. That is clearly not my intent in clarifying a situation. I am just being myself. But I thought I had to change something about myself…

Then the next day I received a package at my door containing a book I had ordered, Women Who Run With the Wolves by Clarissa Pinkola Estes. Here is a quote from page 1:

The spiritual lands of Wild Woman have, throughout history, been plundered or burnt, dens bulldozed, and natural cycles forced into unnatural rhythms to please others.

She continues to explain what a Wild Woman is:

When women reassert their relationship with the wildish nature, they are gifted with a permanent and internal watcher, a knower, a visionary, an oracle, an inspiratrice, an intuitive, a maker, a  creator, an inventor, and a listener who guide, suggest, and urge vibrant life in the inner and outer worlds. (page 6)

Tears came to my eyes as I read her words. It was truth. For all those who have experienced my “directness,” please know that I speak from a deep wild place. I share what I know that has been shown to me by this life. I am not here to hurt you, but to speak this truth.

I work with many women (and men) who are cut off from their wild nature. Modern culture has cut us off from our natural rhythms. We are caught in this new unnatural cycle of trying to please others and put their reactions ahead of our truth.

Of course we must care for others. Of course we should not intentionally hurt others for our gain. Of course we can’t be unnecessarily aggressive. But we can speak our truth. In fact, we must. Especially women and girls must find their natural truth. And if we all do this, the world will adjust. We, and the world, will be more whole for it.

Come work with me, transform your life, become more whole, and find your wild side. www.holisticlegalservices.com

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